Static J V.s xXTormentXx

[†SaW†]

Usual Rules apply..

no hate votes
no dickride
self-explained votes only.....

i guess around 5-6 bars at the max.....

Static drops first....

Due date: whenever but if you take forever ima drop mines....aight

Checkin in.....

[†SaW†]

Aight ima drop first cuz I'm in the 1-3-1 Zone lol..Peep it~

..Listen if u call 911, then dude better try-uh-medic,
Cuz with Insulin, i bet da shots..u still "Die"-uh-bedic..
..So dam tor spyin within lines, connect da Cam-Server,
"Blow" ur top off, until it get Windy/Wendy like Ham-Burger..
..Pussy, fuck a textris-dog n have you shed blockin-fur,
Couldn't see me fuckin his girl, cuz i been-knockin-her/Binculer..lol
..I'll slap dis nicca across his tongue, watchin da salvia-glands,
Cuz Static couldn't clap-heat, if he was a miami fan wit lava-hands..
..Dam I'm over his flows, like rocs durin seasons of niagra-"Falls",
So u couldn't play-hard, if i had da remote now ur Viagra-Pause..
..Clapback wit da shellz, n J brains Hang-out like crip-Bandanas,
Until tor end "Static", wit his top-up like a cellphone ""Antenna"...Eazy

Good Luck....

[Jay747]

Yo I don't battle fags but for this nigga i'll make an exception,
the only time u come hard is when u got an erection, so i suggest you wear protection,

cause i'll burn you like the fires of hell, have you fearing me like satan,
this kid can't hurt me cuz he fires blanks like when he's masturbatin,

he's from philly so you know he'll be gettin' jiggy wit' big willie,
when you read his location be aware he ain't jokin' when he says he fill - Lee!

shit he even admits it, like he rips niccas, yeah their assholes,
fuck them so hard 'til it bleeds and their ass' swole,

now that's really fucked up, what i'd call Torment,
hey I feel bad for his mother like in the state of lament.

I think that's self - explanatory but if y'all don't understand something ask me.

Good luck man and lets get these votes up....

[Jay747]

uppin' for votes...

[G-Rated]

Flow: Torment
Personals: Static J
Punches: Torment
Multies: Torment
Wordplay: Torment
Overall Enjoyment: Torment

Static J you had alot of played concepts that you failed to make yours...No creativity...You only got the personal category, because you attempted to do things with his location & interests...And those where not good at all, but you got the cat for effort...You need to work on structuring your verse, use words that "contour" your drop...And make your punches hit hard...

My Vote: Torment

[†SaW†]

aight thanks for the voting G-Rated 1-0 my way still uppin

[†SaW†]

Still uppin this battle 1-0 my way

[Illustration]

Wow....I thought I'd be impressed here...I've seen these concepts years ago...

Torment-

..Listen if u call 911, then dude better try-uh-medic,
Cuz with Insulin, i bet da shots..u still "Die"-uh-bedic..
..So dam tor spyin within lines, connect da Cam-Server,
"Blow" ur top off, until it get Windy/Wendy like Ham-Burger..

EHhh..decent opener..1st line..seen similar wordplay back in 99...2nd..why are you talkin' about gunplay over the internet?!? It does NOTHING...decent wordplay at best...3rd...filler...last line...meh...I see the wordplay..but it juss doesn't hit...

..Pussy, fuck a textris-dog n have you shed blockin-fur,
Couldn't see me fuckin his girl, cuz i been-knockin-her/Binculer..lol
..I'll slap dis nicca across his tongue, watchin da salvia-glands,
Cuz Static couldn't clap-heat, if he was a miami fan wit lava-hands..

1st..ehhhhh..forced the multi at the end and it was filler to me...2nd line..no..first of all..its BINOCULARS...and that was just wack...3rd...alrite..prolly a better line..and that was a setup..last line..no..if that wasn't forced wordplay at its finest..I dunno what is...

..Dam I'm over his flows, like rocs durin seasons of niagra-"Falls",
So u couldn't play-hard, if i had da remote now ur Viagra-Pause..
..Clapback wit da shellz, n J brains Hang-out like crip-Bandanas,
Until tor end "Static", wit his top-up like a cellphone ""Antenna"...Eazy

Wow..1st line..if they dont get the 'niagara/flows/falls' wordplay..then the voter must be a retard..2nd line...ANYTHING to do with 'cumming/playing/hard' have been played since 99...and how can you pause viagra? 3rd...ehh..alrite I guess...last line was prolly the best line of your entire verse...

Static-

Yo I don't battle fags but for this nigga i'll make an exception,
the only time u come hard is when u got an erection, so i suggest you wear protection,
cause i'll burn you like the fires of hell, have you fearing me like satan,
this kid can't hurt me cuz he fires blanks like when he's masturbatin,

Meh..not impressed here either..1st line..setup..2nd line..again..'coming/hard' lines are PLAYED...3rd line..okay wordplay but seen too many satan concepts..last line..blah...I won't even go there..

[quote]he's from philly so you know he'll be gettin' jiggy wit' big willie,
when you read his location be aware he ain't jokin' when he says he fill - Lee!
shit he even admits it, like he rips niccas, yeah their assholes,
fuck them so hard 'til it bleeds and their ass' swole,
now that's really fucked up, what i'd call Torment,
hey I feel bad for his mother like in the state of lament.[/qupte]

I dont even know where to go with this...I see the wordplay in the asshole lines..but its juss too lame...

Jesus christ..I'm not tryin' to give too much bad criticism but you guys got a LOT to work on...first you need to realize what concepts have been played and flipped across the internet..cause to me..you BOTH need a LOT of work to do...as far as the punches go...I guess Torment grabbed this with the 'Static' nameplay in his last line...but other than that..I wasn't impressed..

Vote = Torment..

PLEASE step your game up cause this newb will start teachin' you guys somethings...

[G-Rated]

2-0 Torment....

[†SaW†]

lol a guy with 4 posts gonna say he heard that shit n like 1999 Roflllllll Brings back to HollaFront memories with their strecth ass lines haha...anyway thanks for the breakdown man n i hope you are what you speak about.

2-0 my way uppin